


Never let me go.

by princess_christa



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-11
Updated: 2016-10-11
Packaged: 2018-08-21 22:32:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8262796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princess_christa/pseuds/princess_christa
Summary: Both Jumin and yourself are struggling with a variety of thoughts and realize it's best to be honest with each other. (I'm going to be switching between the reader and Jumin throughout the fic)





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is 100% pure fluff and I hope you all like it!

It was the third, and probably the last, night you were going to spend at Jumin's apartment. Things were getting hectic in the RFA, from the whole arranged marriage situation, to Seven and Yoosung's secret mission, to Elizabeth being found, the amount of things that had happened in the past few days was simply too much to handle. Jumin was starting to act more like himself but you could tell that he still had some issues that needed to be addressed.

Although he had began talking more about his thoughts, there were times when he got back from work and it was clear that he was struggling with himself. More than anything else, you wished he would share some of his burdens with you, merely being by his side didn't seem enough. He kept saying that just staying at his house helped but did it, really?

Maybe you were doing more harm than good, maybe seeing you every day just clouded his judgment further, maybe you were the reason he had become so unstable. You came into his world without no warning whatsoever and completely turned it upside down, you brought up memories that were long ago laid to rest, feelings resurfaced that revealed a whole new person to all the members of the RFA and you asked yourself whether that was a good thing or not.

 

* * *

 

She swore that it was her choice to stay with him, because she only wished for him to get better, but was that the case? Did he make her feel imprisoned? Did she spend her nights afraid that he might do something to hurt her? Did she get through the day counting down the hours until she could go home? Did she hate him?

He didn't keep her with him because he wanted to rob her of every little bit of freedom, she gave him a sense of security, she was someone that filled him with courage, coming back to her at the end of the day was what motivated him to actually get work done. He put on the image of a cold and emotionless business man every time he went outside but with her, he could finally be himself. She saw him for who he really was and she stayed.

But did she really stay?

After all it was him that insisted she remain at his apartment, if she had the option of leaving then would she have really stayed? He wanted to believe that she would.

 

* * *

 

Your thoughts refused to let you go to sleep and you spent hours tossing and turning in Jumin's bed. You wondered what he would be doing at this hour. Would he go yet another night without sleep? Thinking of him going to work without getting enough rest worried you.

Everyone else in the RFA might have thought that all you wanted to do was leave his apartment but they were wrong. You knew that if you had a conversation with Jumin about it he would let you go but returning to Rika's place was not an option for you. He needed you and, even if it was not much, you would stay by his side until things were okay again.

You knew there was no way he would ever hurt you. Zen was terrified but he didn't make an effort to understand Jumin. He cherished you and, while it was hard for him to express that, you understood. Jaehee was troubled by the meaning of the tangled threads inside his head but you saw them and, again, you understood. He was not an easy person, he was complicated and hurt and reluctant to trust anyone around him but he was also so much more than that.

And seeing him in pain turned your stomach into knots.

You got up and searched for him. He was sitting on the couch, lights dimly lit, and he looked like he was sleeping. 

 

* * *

 

He heard her enter and slowly opened his eyes. She was standing at the other side of the room, her hair tangled and her eyes puffy.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?", he asked her, trying to come back to reality.

She shook her head no and approached him. She was so beautiful that he felt his heart rate increase and his stomach tighten. Was this what people called butterflies? It was something new to him. She took a seat next to him on the couch and reluctantly reached out her hand and put it over his.

"I have some things I want to say to you", the words seemed to resonate through the room.

Why did he feel so scared of what he was about to hear? This was also something new, but not in a good way.

"Did I do something to make you uncomfortable?", he asked, trying to guess her thoughts.

She was silent, but she never took her eyes off him. Did she hear what he had said? She seemed to be studying him, her gaze traveled from his messy hair, to his lips, to his shirt, which was all wrinkled from being slept in. He stayed silent and waited for her to continue talking but she never did.

 

* * *

 

You were lost in a world you were just beginning to discover. You looked at him and saw him in a completely different way than you ever had before. He always wished you good morning and good night in picture perfect conditions, but the Jumin you saw now was still sleepy, and his clothes were unironed, he looked half in a dream and this side of him was something new to you, so you wanted to take it all in, because who knew when you'd get a chance to see him like that again.

His hand was cold under yours, since he didn't have a blanket with him and it was winter.

"I'm sorry, I lost myself for a bit", you apologized and smiled so he would know nothing was wrong.

But you forgot who you were dealing with, the look on his face was clearly the look of someone very, very anxious.

"Jumin, it's okay. I'm okay, just a little tired. Before you say anything, you're not the reason I'm tired, well at least not in the way you have in mind. I think the time has come for me to be honest about how this whole situation has affected me, I owe you that much, and I want you to listen to my feelings as well", you turned around and crossed your legs, taking both of his hands in yours, "You see, I wanted to come and see you even before Jaehee suggested it, so I was really glad that she asked me to meet you in person. Hearing your voice on the phone whenever you called me made me very happy, especially when I said something that made you laugh. It filled me with joy when I heard your laugh, I think it's very beautiful. When your relationship with your father started getting worse I was worried, I didn't understand the reason but it brought out a side of you that none of us expected to see. That's why I wanted to make sure you were fine in person. You keep saying that just by being here I've made everything easier for you but I often catch myself wondering if that's true. Do I make your days better or do I just add to your anxiety? Am I just a reminder of hurtful things that happened in your past? Are you suffering because I'm here? I keep thinking about all these things and I'm sure you have similar thoughts as well, so I want to answer some of them. First of all, I want to remind you again that I'm here because it's my choice and you're not taking away any of my freedom. My place right now is by your side, and I will stay until I'm able to take away as much of your pain as possible. You've been through so much these past couple of days and I've seen many different sides of you but I still trust you, and I will continue trusting you, so please don't fret about that anymore. But what I always want you to remember is that I will never leave you, even if we have to be apart I'm still yours, and I want to believe that you're mine as well. Things might get hard and we might get angry and frustrated at each other but even then, I won't go anywhere. You're the only one I want to be with". 

 

* * *

 

The sound of her voice alone was enough to make him feel at peace. At first he dreaded to hear the words that would come out of her mouth, but once she started talking he realized that she wouldn't say anything to hurt him. Even before he was honest with himself regarding his feelings for her, he kept calling her when he was having a hard day, just because listening to her speak took away most of the negative emotions that were welling up inside of him.

While listening to her he made sure to pay close attention to the expressions she was making. Sometimes she looked away, to the wall, to the floor or to their tangled hands and sometimes she smiled, a big, happy smile when she talked about his laugh, a sad smile when she wondered if she was doing him harm and towards the end he thought he saw her eyes fill with tears so he pulled her closer.

She was so dear to him. If she ever cried in front of him it would be as if his whole world was crumbling, so he was willing to try his best to make her feel safe.

"Please don't cry. I don't want to see you cry, especially now. I'm so sorry. This is my fault, but since you were so straight forward with me I also want to tell you about all the things I've experienced since you came here. Honestly, I didn't expect you to show up at my apartment, even more so on Jaehee's request. But when I saw you I felt like things would slowly get better for me. I apologize for my actions, I went overboard a lot of times but it gets hard for me to control my emotions. Even so, you remained here and supported me through everything that happened, you were honest with me and helped me grow as a person. I hope that with time I can tell you more about myself and I can learn more about you in return, because you intrigue me so much. You were not able to see it, but you coming here has only had a positive impact on me, if I didn't have you I don't know what I would have done when Elizabeth 3rd went missing, or when I stopped talking with my father. You might think you bring back memories of Rika, but don't ever compare yourself to her. You're so much more than her, and that's why my feelings for you are so much stronger. I haven't felt this way about anyone before, maybe it's because of the circumstances under which we met, but you're someone I'd give everything for. And if it's because of all these difficulties that we came to be like this then I'd go through all of them again. You are more than worth it. I wish you had told me this sooner, it saddens me to know you've been having all these thoughts, the last thing I need is to see you with tears in your eyes".

He wasn't sure about what to do next. Would she be comfortable if he hugged her, or did she just want to return to bed? He had never been through a similar situation so he was confused.

She untangled her hands from his and pushed his hair back, pausing to examine him once more. He wondered what was going through her mind and tilted his head to the side. She mirrored him. After a few moments of looking at one another in silence he saw the tears that had started running down her face, but still she was silent.

"I'm so happy that I could be a useful person to you", her voice cracked, and at that moment he knew.

He wiped away her tears and gently pulled her closer to him, planting his lips against hers. She was warm and her cheeks were wet, but he didn't mind. He had only kissed her once before, and it wasn't how it imagined it to be, so he wanted this to be their first kiss. He ran his fingers through her hair and she put her arms around him, grabbing hold of his shirt as if she was afraid he'd disappear if she let go. She was so fragile he was scared that she might break under his touch but even so, he touched her. 

 

* * *

 

Your lips gave way under his instantly, you longed for the moment he would kiss you for real. His tongue brushed over yours in the softest possible way and his fingers traveled over your spine, causing your hair to stand on end. Every single one of his movements was incredibly tender, he treated you like a piece of art, valuable beyond measure, and you wish he'd never stop. You didn't know how much time had passed when he pulled back to look at you. He held you in his arms and buried his face in the nape of your neck.

"I love you", he whispered.

"I love you too", you answered and realized that his cheeks were wet as well.

**Author's Note:**

> Who knew I could write something that isn't smut!


End file.
